what a day...

well vince started out not wanting to eat..althogh sucked down a 6 oz sippy of apple juice..so i went ahead and did his TOBI and tried breakfast..did better eating about 4-5 bites of applesauce..only 1 enzyme instead of 2 since he had a little poop trouble yesterday..but not bad..so he started whining at the kitchen and wanted more juice and i allowed it..he climbed the gate so i got the monkey off and sat him in his highchair,since he didnt fight me with the chair like normal i offered his sippy and cherrios while i switchd laundry..he has eaten cherrios very wll since about 11 month old..but when i turned aound to sit the clean clothes on the dryer i noticed his tray looked funny,so i check and he puked a TON mostly juice..and 1 cherrio..it scares me because this was the 1st time in 2 days that he has eaten well and then he puked..maybe he ate too fast or something im not sure! and so on my wall i posted that i am not ready for a g tube that im afraid he won't be himself once he gets it..i also hate the thought of anesthia!!!!! but as what is becoming a good friend told me maybe this is a sign from GOD that we shouldn't wait too long for the tube..he may need it sooner than we exspected..i know in my min and in my heart it will do wonders for ALL of us..we wont have the stress of almost needing to force him to eat each day,the stress on vince of having to touch food either here or at therapy..althogh when he gets this tube im thinking take a break from therapy only a short few week break,for us to get adjusted to the "new life" and for vince to heal and not worry (on us all) but i DO want to continue with therapy and not make the g tube a lifetime ordeal..unless it NEEDS to be..i want to continue to fight and help my baby boy...i want to have a meeting forour families who are interested in knowing more with us coming in to see vince and have a meeting right in his room with the dr! i really dont know what the best thing is right now..im so lost and confused..i am also a bit worried about school..for myself..my schooling is online and although i can take my laptop it does not have all the required programs..my teachers are wonderful and already understand that i have things going on at home! im hoping at therapy they have a scale so we can weigh vince..if he has lost by that point i will call the dr! if he is about the same i will try having him checked each monday at therapy..if his weight does not change and he does not begin to eat breakfast and dinner the way he was a month ago then on Feb. 1st when we go back to the CF center we will discuss the G tube more in depth and possibly set a date..please keep us in your prayers as this is a VERY hard choice to make!